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Her Wild Journey_Seeing Ranch series Page 20
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Page 20
“This one might be a real blizzard,” someone said.
Cadence sharply looked up from her plate. For the first time, she noticed everyone but Beau was there. Had he made it back to the ranch yet?
She didn’t dare ask, but if the tightness in Mitch’s face was any indication, he was concerned about Beau’s whereabouts as well.
The chatter went on, everyone enjoying the meal, but the awful feeling in Cadence’s stomach only increased. Why hadn’t Beau returned to the ranch with Nat? Had he chosen to stay in town?
“Where’s Beau?” Gemma finally asked.
“Said he was gonna get some wood for the Duffs,” Nat answered with a frown. “He should have been back by now, though.”
The table fell quiet. Not too far away, the wind picked up. Suddenly, it hit the house with a powerful force and the window went white.
Exclamations exploded all around the table, while Cadence’s stomach plummeted to the very floor. Beau.
Was he out there somewhere? This second storm already looked worse than the first. She’d heard stories of blizzards that lasted for days. If this was one of those, what chance would a man have of making it safely home?
Cadence kept her eyes on her food, but the plate quickly became unfocused. What was the last thing she had said to Beau? That he was not her friend?
Nausea pushed its way up her chest. It had been a terrible thing to say, even if it was true. The fact of the matter was that neither one of them could help the circumstances they’d found themselves in. They were both victims of tragedy and bad fortune. Perhaps she could not bring herself to look him in the eye anymore, but that did not mean she needed to say such vile things to him.
Unable to eat another bite, Cadence put her fork and knife down. Still, the storm raged on, each minute seeming louder than the last.
The dismal mood could be felt all around the table. When supper finished, the men all relocated to the main room to start a fire and smoke, unable as they were to go outside. In the kitchen, Cadence’s hands shook as she washed and swept. She kept her gaze averted from Gemma and Clara, her face down. If the other women noticed her mood, they did not comment on it.
For what could be said, anyway? There was a snowstorm and no one knew where Beau was. No words of comfort could change the hard facts.
The hours passed in misery, with Cadence’s soul only becoming heavier. Finally, as eight o’clock rolled around, the wind and snow died, revealing a night of ice and bitter cold.
Cadence and Gemma peeked out the door, taking the silent yard in.
“Perhaps he will be here any minute,” Gemma whispered.
Cadence did not respond. She only closed the door and set to pacing in the hall. Everyone left her alone as another half hour passed. Still, no Beau.
“We need to go and look for him,” she burst out, her voice’s return fast and emotional.
“Not yet.” Mitch stood in the main room’s doorway looking at her. “There could be another storm on the way. We can’t risk getting caught in it.”
“But… but...”
I need to find him.
Mitch’s nose flared. She knew he was in similar pain and that he believed he knew what was best in the situation, but Cadence had a deeper instinct propelling her forward. She was going to find Beau and no one would stop her.
“I need a horse.” She stepped up to him. “Please.”
“No, Cadence, that’s not a good idea—”
“I have to,” she stressed.
They stared each other down, Cadence silently imploring him to let her have her way.
Mitch rubbed his face. “Shoot… fine. Take a horse. And the lantern hanging by the door, too.”
“Thank you!”
She turned to go, but he stopped her with a touch on her shoulder. “Cadence. Know you’re taking a real risk here.”
“I know.” She solemnly nodded. “And I am prepared to take it.”
Quickly, before Gemma or Nat or anyone else could see what she was doing and ask to go along—for Cadence was not willing to put anyone else in danger—she pulled her coat, gloves, and hat on and grabbed the lantern from the hook.
And she went into the night.
As soon as the door clicked shut behind Cadence, each muscle in her body tightened. Fear shot up through her core and assaulted every inch of her skin. The dark knew she was there and it knew she was afraid. It fed on her terror, lapping it up and returning it tenfold.
She could not do this.
How could she do this?
Beau. Closing her lids, Cadence saw his hazel eyes. She felt his touch on her cheek. The night had always held her greatest fears, but tonight, it also contained something else: the man she needed to save. He was out there somewhere, maybe believing the end had come.
No. Cadence had seen too much death. The grim reaper would not take another person from her without a fight.
The snow crunched under her left foot and her right leg dragged pitifully across the top of it. She pushed on, taking the agony that filled her up and using it to propel herself forward. She could do this. She was more than this fear.
The greater the darkness, the greater the light. She repeated that truth over and over to herself as she entered the stable and saddled Pip.
“We can do this, boy,” she told the horse, who flicked his tail in response, seeming to know they had an important mission on their hands.
Keeping the lantern clenched tight in her hand, she led Pip from the stable and climbed into the saddle. Each time she mounted a horse, it became easier. Tonight, she was on the animal in record time. Together, they set off, walking in the direction of town.
Hot shivers ran down Cadence’s back, each one close on the heels of the last. She trembled so much the lantern shook, but she just clenched her jaw and kept going.
The fresh snow made it harder for Pip, but that allowed Cadence more time to survey the areas they passed through.
“Beau?” she called. Her yell boomeranged back to her.
Yes, she was all alone in the night. The realization only made her tremble more.
“We can do this,” she repeated, over and over again, in between calling Beau’s name.
Cadence studied the natural landmarks around her. She’d passed the cattle ranch in between Winding Path and town not long ago. That meant she was over halfway to Shallow Springs.
“Beau!” she yelled again, her throat becoming hoarse.
“Hello?” came a sudden answer.
Cadence’s breath caught on a cold inhale and a figure emerged from the dark, riding into the poor light of her lantern.
It was him. Beau was alive.
A gurgle escaped from Cadence and the tears she’d held back all night flowed.
“What are you doing out here?” Beau rode his horse up to Pip, his eyebrows threaded in confusion.
“I… I came looking for you,” she responded through cries. She did not even care that Beau was seeing her in such a fragile state. He was alive! Right then, nothing else mattered.
She shook her head in despair. “I thought… you had…”
Beau’s face softened. “No. The storm hit while I was still in town, so I holed up with the Duff family. They live right near Main Street. How did you...” A confused look replaced his words. He inspected Cadence’s face, the lantern, Pip. “You rode all this way by yourself?”
“I had to find you. Mitch said it would be dangerous and I would not ask anyone else to do it for me.”
Beau nodded, still looking dazed. “We need to get back to the ranch quick. I figured I could chance it riding back, but it ain’t the smartest idea. Come on.”
The horses needed hardly any urging at all. They were eager to get back to the warmth of their cozy stable. Cadence and Beau rode side-by-side, confusing feelings rising in Cadence’s heart.
She had braved the night. It still terrified her, but it had also shown that it could not break her down. Despite the agony it caused, she had ridden out into
it, because when you loved someone, you put everything on the line for them.
Loved. She loved Beau.
Of course, she still did. That was why his actions caused her so much pain.
But her riding out to find him hadn’t been about repairing their relationship. It was about saving him, making sure that he was all right. Nothing about the act had anything to do with Cadence herself.
“I can’t believe you did that,” Beau said once they were in the stable, putting the horses away.
“I cannot either,” she admitted.
He looked down at her, his admiration clear. “What happened to your fear of the dark?”
“It is still there,” she admitted. “But what was even more terrifying than the dark was standing in that house, thinking something might have happened to you.”
Her voice broke at the end and she had to look away.
“Cadence,” Beau softly whispered, honey-sweet, making her look back at him. “Thank you. I can’t believe you did that.”
His eyes… There was so much in them right then. Pain. Joy. Appreciation?
Cadence could not read into Beau’s expression. Doing that would only cause her more pain.
“I should go to the house,” she said, turning away. “Let them know we are all right.”
“I’ll walk with you.”
“No. I have the lantern. Thank you.”
At the stable door, she paused, just in case Beau had something more to say. He didn’t. She had faced her greatest fear, but yet, nothing had changed at all. They were still in the place they had been before.
Thank goodness Beau could not see her face.
Biting down on her bottom lip to keep her sob back, Cadence slipped from the stable.
Chapter Thirty-Two
32. Beau
Chapter thirty-two
Beau took his time in the stable, though there wasn’t much to do. Still, he checked all the water troughs and feed buckets, made sure the mud in the cracks between the boards was holding up all right, and tossed some fresh straw in a few of the stalls.
Still, he couldn’t get Cadence out of his head. She’d been an angel emerging from the dark night and he hadn’t even been in need of saving. He would have made it back to the ranch just fine on his own.
But still, she’d come for him. After everything that he had done to her. He’d helped her parents die, caused the limp that she suffered from every day, fallen in love with her and then broken their engagement… Out of all the awful things a man could do a woman, he’d covered about half of them.
Yet, she still cared for him. How could that be? When they’d spoken in town, her distaste was palpable. Now, here she was, facing her greatest fear just to make sure he was all right. It didn’t make sense. Not one bit.
Beau Johnson was bad for Cadence Hurley. She was supposed to acknowledge that, turn away, keep on hating him.
With the chill seeping into the stable, Beau left it for the night. A storm could still be imminent, but taking the chance and going to the main house seemed worth it. Anyway, it was sure to be warm, while his little cabin currently sat dark and cold as a cave.
In the house, Beau nearly jumped back in surprise to discover all the ranch hands in the main room, sipping hot cider and playing cards.
“Beau’s alive!”
“We thought you’d turned into an ice cube!”
“Or faked your own death so you could start all over!”
The men all laughed and patted him on the back. Mitch was the only one who just shook his hand, a relieved look on his face. “You look cold.”
“I feel it,” Beau admitted. He licked his dry lips. Half of the reason he’d come in was to find Cadence. Now that he was in the house, he didn’t know why. There was nothing to say to her. He was still the same person he’d been before they met in the dark road an hour earlier.
As for her? He didn’t know what she was thinking or feeling, but gosh, he wanted to.
“Go get some supper.” Mitch gestured for the door. “Clara saved you a plate.”
Beau nodded and left the room, his heart stuck up somewhere in his throat. The cozy embrace of the kitchen drew him in. So much about it was familiar. The smooth, wooden table and chairs. The wood box overflowing with split logs. The crackling cook stove. That smell of mixed spices.
There was only one thing missing: the woman he wanted to see the most. Instead of Cadence, Clara sat at the table alone, her knitting needles clicking and flashing in the lamplight.
“Oh, am I glad to see you.” The needles dropped into her lap and she pressed her palms against her heart. “You had us all worried to death.”
“Sorry, Clara.” Beau removed his hat and guiltily smiled. He didn’t give a rat’s tail when it came to what most people thought, but Clara was one of the few who was an exception. She’d always taken good care of him and letting her down never felt good.
She nodded at the untouched plate of food on the table. “Have a seat. Hopefully, it’s still warm, but if not, I can pop it in the stove.”
“This will be just fine, thank you.” Setting his hat on the table, he picked up the waiting fork and knife. All he could do was stare at the ham and potatoes, though. Hungry as he’d been earlier, he now had no appetite.
Course, Clara noticed. “I know you’re probably going to say ‘no’ to this,” she said, pursing her lips over those busy needles, “but do you want to share what’s on your mind?”
Beau sighed and set the cutlery back down. “Where are Gemma and Cadence?”
“They took to bed, I imagine. It’s late and the men are having a regular shindig out there. Gemma claims their noise gives her a headache.” Clara inspected him. “What do you think of Cadence riding out there to look for you?”
“I can’t believe Mitch let her go.”
“I imagine he knew he wouldn’t be able to stop her.”
“Huh.” Beau stared into the open cook stove. Talk and laughter from the main room entered the kitchen, but otherwise, the house was silent. Had Cadence really retired? Or was she sitting up, thinking about everything that had happened, just like he was?
Beau rubbed his eyes, trying to push away all the confusion. All the pain.
Great tarnations, what he wouldn’t give to be a better man. The best one Cadence had met in her whole life. If he could, he would have done everything right for her, worked himself to the bone to make her happy.
Just to see her smile every day for the rest of his life… It would make all the pain he’d been through worth it.
Clara’s voice pierced his thoughts. “I’m thinking you should probably start talking about now.”
“’Bout what?” Beau cocked a brow.
“Tell me what’s on your mind. Why don’t you think you and Cadence can be happy together?”
Beau shook his head, looking away. His gaze fell on the fist he hadn’t known was curled.
“You think I’m going to share anything you tell me?” Clara challenged. “Shoot, I don’t talk to those men out there. Not about anything that doesn’t involve pie.”
Beau chuckled, which felt strange. When had he last laughed?
“It’s a little too late to start sharing, Clara. I’ve gone a long time not talking.”
The honesty surprised even Beau. He’d never gotten close to so much as hinting at his past. The one person who knew the full story of his life hated him.
Clara’s face remained soft, the work her hands tended to steady. A thick scarf grew in her lap, its blue color distorted by the cook stove’s light. Beau thought about how the room they sat in was one of his favorite places in the whole world. Other than out in the fields, there was nowhere else where he was happy and at home. It made the idea of sharing all his secrets a little less intimidating.
“It’s not a happy story.”
“Only about half of them are.”
Beau opted to look at the burning logs instead of Clara. “I, uh… Cadence’s parents died ‘bout six years ago.”<
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“Mm-hmm,” Clara muttered. He couldn’t tell if that was to show him she knew this already, or if it was to encourage him to go on.
“I was there the day it happened. I saw their smoke signal asking for help and I didn’t stop. Figured I couldn’t…”
Beau’s throat became thick as he remembered how pale Abigail had looked that day. If he could tell the story without mentioning her, it was best. No point in making his confession any harder. This wasn’t about her, anyway. He’d done his best to save Abigail. This story was about his second failure that day.